The Friday Shirt Project

I know I haven’t said much here lately. There has been a lot going on in our family that we need to pray about so I am going to continue to take remain quiet for another week or so.

BUT- with the election approaching so quickly, I was really trying to keep my mouth shut but I just can’t. There are many reasons why I am not voting for Obama. But these are 2 main reasons.

Born Alive. This is so so sad to watch. Obama is in favor of allowing babies born alive in an abortion to lie there and die. Frightening.

Make video montages at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Obama’s views on the redistribution of wealth is socialist. We are not a socialist country. This interview was on Chicago’s WBEZ.FM.

2 posts in one day!  Wow!

I have 3 friends that are at the pinnacle of their adoptions. I have been following their stories from almost day 1 of their journeys and I really want them to know how much I am praying for them.

Please keep my friend Jane in your prayers as her husband and her 2 older daughters travel to Ethiopia tomorrow (!!) to pick up their baby girl.

Also, my friend Kristin who is in Ghana right now and is waiting for the paperwork to be complete so she can bring Raymond and Delali home to Minnesota.

And last but certainly not least, my friend Ginny way out in Virginia who is due very soon with Beatrix and waiting to arrange their final travel plans to bring home Samuel and Moses from Liberia.

I am so excited about this new plan of ours. We are still going to pursue adoption slowly but the fundraising aspect of the adoption is certainly creating a tremendous spiritual warfare within my soul, which is an entirely different discussion.

So-for now, to appease my heart’s desire to help children without parents, even though I cannot take all of them home with me right now, my husband and I have agreed to contribute 10% of his company’s profits to the Hohoe orphanage in the Volta Region of Ghana. I have emailed a woman who now lives in Hohoe and helps run the orphanage with Nicholas, a man who runs and pays for this orphanage with his own salary at the Tourist Director of his town. After volunteering for Nicholas at the Hohoe orphanage, she now moved from her home in Australia to live in Ghana indefinitely. So, we are confident that 100% of the funds that we send to them directly go to the children.

Here is their new website…http://www.hohoeorphanage.com. Ethan is planning on going at his business full time soon (possibly today…he is in a meeting as we speak) and since now I have great motivation for the company to make oodles of money, I will be his right hand woman. I will do the admin work and the accounting.

We also plan to get more involved with Shaohannah’s Hope. I am going to call my church to see if they will start an orphan ministry to benefit this wonderful organization. If anybody still reads this blog, please let me know if you have any experience in this. Since we are kind of in between parishes right now, I do not know the protocol for any of this, but that has never stopped me before.
I feel like I have some kind of direction now. We are certainly going to keep going with the adoption, but instead of fundraising in the community, which was taking up A LOT of my time, I am going to focus on helping Ethan grow his business so that we can earn the money ourselves. I don’t know if it’s the right thing to do, but it’s our plan for today and I feel peace, even great excitement with this decision.

With this election approaching and all of the talk about the Palin family, I am so saddened by abortion. All of those millions of babies and the mothers’ suffering. I found the chart below at a great website…www.prolifetoolkit.com. I thought this comparison of the Holocaust and abortion was a striking demonstration on America’s perspective of abortion.

In my own mind, I think about conversing with others around this topic. I am passionate about educating people about the worldwide orphan crisis. And then I think, what if someone argued with me about ending abortion to only increase the amount of orphans?  When Rick Warren asked McCain this exact question, he answered “Well I think we have to make adoption a lot easier in this country.  That’s why so many people go to other countries to … be able to adopt children” Amen.

BTW, Obama’s answer, “I think it’s something that we should sit down and figure out.” He goes on to say, “I think that part of our plan, though, has to be: how do we prevent more orphans in the first place?”

To get all of the transcripts to Rick Warrren’s interview of Obama and McCain, go here.

Below is the chart I referred to previously.

Job 12:10: In [God's] hand is the life of every creature and the breath of all mankind.

Thanks everyone for your kind support and prayers!! After a few days of recovering from the miscarriage, wouldn’t you know it, we all get the stomach flu. Of course, we would. We are finally all feeling 100% again and EJ is off for his first day of Kindergarten today! I don’t know who is more nervous, him or his neurotic, anxious, excited mother.

We haven’t made any big decisions yet. I really feel like we don’t have to at this point. I know the Holy Spirit is going to guide us when she sees fit. Right now, I am getting school started, and getting ready to teach EJ’s Religious Education classes.

I reread my last post and wow am I a serious person!  I am going to try and just “be” for a bit and laugh a lot. Big Ethan and I had a conversation before he left town a few days ago and we are both feeling very antsy, as always. I think he said it best when he said, “I feel like I forgot to do my homework.” It’s an unsettled feeling that we constantly have. I think it’s spiritual warfare at its greatest peak. The devil might be doing this to distract us, or it’s the Holy Spirit trying to get us jazzed up for something or telling us to slow down. I think time will tell.

Thanks for all of the prayers. We have SO much to be thankful for and we are not letting any of that slip us by. I am ending this with a poem, I think I saw it on my friend’s Sue’s blog. I just love it.

Just Say “YES” 

It is “finished” was what He said.
Jesus paid the price for all of our debt.
The greatest sacrifice, He gave His life.
Oh how He loves us, this selfless act of Christ.
My heart longs to repay you, the Lord of my life.
You cannot repay Me my child, but take My hand and I will be your guide.
What can I do Lord, to show you my love?

Step out of your comfort zone, I promise you will never be alone.
Go forth, and let my light shine through.
Let people see Me in all that you do.
Be selfless and loving, let go of your pride.
People might curse you, but fear not, I will be at your side.
I have a great task for you at hand,
you must leave the old, and embrace a new plan.

Yes, Lord I will follow, please show me the way.
I will bring  glory and honor to  you each day.
The door is open and I am walking through.
I am saying “yes” I will be an ambassador for You.

Spiritual discernment : calling on the Holy Spirit to lead or give direction on a matter. It is how the Spirit shows the church or its people what God wants them to do and be.

I find discernment to be a great struggle in my life. Sometimes, I struggle with how to listen and trust God’s voice in ways that go beyond our human sense of hearing. I pray and hold out my hand allowing the Holy Spirit to grab hold and guide me to where I am supposed to turn without actually feeling the hand the way we feel with our human sense of touch. I sit in a quiet place and tell God, “I am here. I am listening.” But sometimes, I cannot turn my mind off. It is racing with my daily responsibilities or repeating a prayer over and over. I am afraid that I am choosing my own ego over the Holy Spirit’s voice.

I haven’t posted in a while for many reasons. I felt like nothing was working out for this adoption. Things just weren’t falling into place like I wanted. For example, we tried to get our fingerprints done, but first Ethan had to renew his drivers license. After 3 visits to the DMV, he finally just got his license Friday. It was a much more frustrating experience than I could ever explain. Another example, I have been trying to find the time to watch our training videos from our agency. A series of 4 DVD’s about 45 minutes each and then there are questions to answer. I chose a night and was going to stick to it. It was a Monday evening and we had nothing going on. Right after dinner, the rain started and the strength of the wind built to be a tremendous storm. Wouldn’t you know it?  The power went out. No videos tonight. It didn’t go back on until we were in bed. I know these seem like small menial obstacles and I know I over analyze everything in my life but this felt like more than that.

I think the most awakening realization and fear that we held for this adoption was our finances. Ethan and I sat down and REALLY analyzed our financial situation and it was a scary sight. I began searching….searching for a way to be able to get a part time job or work from home to try and help out financially. But all of my spare time (when the kids were napping or sleeping at night) was spent doing fundraising plans and/or my housechores. I prayed for guidance.  In my mind, I couldn’t justify spending time at fundraising when I could be focusing on helping our finances to afford the children we already do have. And I knew I needed to provide for Ethan time, patience and support to develop his business.

I prayed again for some guidance.

Well…my prayers were answered, but certainly not in the way I expected. Two pink lines was what God had panned for us, for a fraction of a moment. I stared at those lines, cried, then laughed and picked up the phone to call Ethan. Silence, then laughter. It only took us a very brief moment to absorb this news and we were ecstatic. A fourth baby on the way!

After a few conversations, we decided we were at a great point to put this adoption on hold. We didn’t have a referral yet and it seemed that God was trying to tell me to slow down. It’s so easy to have complete discernment when I am pregnant. My mission feels so clear.

I have to say it was a tremendous relief to put this adoption on hold. Pregnancy…familiar, not easy, but familiar. Adoption…unknown, expensive, unknown…

We told a few close friends and a few family members about our exciting news. I hadn’t officially told our agency or anyone really about our plans. We were adjusting to our change still but just elated with a fourth baby on the way.

I could tell by the tone of her voice when she said “It looks like your HCG level is down to 61.” The number at 6 weeks should be reaching 8-10,000. The blood and tears were a continuous flow. I had been bleeding for over a day now and the nurse was trying to be as nice as possible. She was trying to convince me there may be still hope for this pregnancy. But I knew in my heart that we weren’t meant to hold this baby here in this life. I never thought I could survive the word miscarriage. I have had plenty of friends endure this agony, but based on my genetics and my history of healthy pregnancies, I never thought it would happen to me.  I am so thankful I was never in any physical pain and that it happened very early. And I am so thankful for my supportive friends to lift me up during this time.

This is where we are at. I am praying ever so hard for discernment.  I have never looked at my children with such complete and utter gratefulness. Totally undeserved grace and the beauty of God present in each little face. I have never looked at my husband with such deep love and sad eyes. I think, if it’s possible, we love each other even more today than we did yesterday.

I have so much to be thankful for and I trust in God that He will show me the way. I am praying for the Holy Spirit to come and lead me to where I need to turn at this point. Right now, I am going to go hug my husband and love my children. And that is all I know.

My walk-a-thon friends’ blog is up and running. I am so excited to introduce…The Kinleys! I just love reading about how strong their faith is. I have always had a soft spot in my heart for couples that cannot have children of their own, but their perspective of the “gift of infertility” is so inspiring.

Please go stop by their blog and welcome them to this blogging world!

For those of you who read my blog, I know I have been MIA for quite some time. I just haven’t been into the blogging thing for a while. Writers block, too much to say…I don’t know.

There will be an update soon……

Why is there evil in this world? I don’t have an answer for that. All I have is trust in God that He knows why people suffer the way they do. But when bad things happen to good people, I really struggle with this.

I haven’t posted about this yet because it has taken me a full day to really process an inconceivable event that I learned of yesterday. Eban House is the orphanage run by AAI (our agency) in Ghana. The other night this orphanage was robbed and attacked by four armed men. That sounds horrific enough but one of the Aunties there was so brave she did all she could to protect what little valuables they had. She wouldn’t tell them where the valuables were and with all of their evil, they raped her multiple times. This woman is so brave she kept silent so as not to wake the children. Because of the culture, she is now going to be divorced by her husband and she has to stop breastfeeding her infant child.

Unfortunately, 4 of the older girls in the orphanage awoke and witnessed violence a child should never have to see. All of the younger children miraculously slept through the horror. There are no words to describe all of the emotions involved with all of this.

I have been trying to write this post for hours. I keep leaving the computer screen and coming back trying to freshen up my thoughts. But I am totally at a lack of words. Anita, the Ghana adoption coordinator is frantically packing up, changing flights so she can get over the Ghana and help the victims in whatever way she can.

The men got away with 2 laptop computers, a digital camera and $1200 cash of the kids’ US Visa money. Most of these material goods have been replaced by generous donations, but what is really lost here…innocence and safety…can never be replaced. How these men could target defenseless women and orphaned children.  I just don’t know. I know I am supposed to pray for their forgiveness and pray that they find Christ in their lives, but I am still just aghast at this. I am not angry, just ever so confused.

Anita explains this much better than I do. She really needs all the support she can get through this. I know all the staff at AAI needs our prayers and support.  Renee over at Steppin Heavenward has a much better understanding and perspective than me. Amy over at Ghana Adopt Three is also frantically packing to get over to Ghana. 2 of the girls that witnessed this violence are her daughters waiting to come home. My prayers are with everyone involved in this horrific assault. Nothing will ever be the same for anyone involved.

I wish there was something I could do for everyone, but I think prayers are what is needed, so I ask everyone reading to please pray for everyone involved, especially for Auntie Esther and all of the children.

There is a fund for Esther and for Eban House at Adoption Advocates International. Just go to How you can help under Humanitarian button and then hit Donate Now and it will give you options to choose from. The fund for Esther will go towards counseling and trying to reestablish her life. I am not sure she will be able to return home.

Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.” Deuteronomy 31:6

Last week our new friends came over with pizza. They are adopting from Korea and we have decided to join efforts and have a walk-a-thon together!  I am so excited!  We decided we will have it on October 11th. In the meantime, we will be calling local businesses for donations for food, water and prizes. There is a lot of work ahead of us but I think this will be great.

We are going to call the local papers and ask them to do a story on us. I am hoping this will give exposure to all of the 143 million orphans out there that need a home. Any ideas or tips, please feel free to leave a comment.